Action Or Reaction?

When you snapped at someone -- were you acting or reacting? . . .

When you made fun of someone -- were you acting or reacting?

When you got mad at someone -- were you acting or reacting?

When you teased someone -- were you acting or reacting?

Reacting, mostly, huh? And, once you've done whatever you've done, it's just incredibly easy for the other person to retaliate.

Then, what happens? Stuff you probably regret, right?

Why not just take charge immediately, and make a decision not to snap at, make fun of, get mad at, or tease people?

Yes, I know. Tough to do? Easier said than done? No way?

Well, look at your life now in those areas -- and look at how your life 'could be'. Don't you think it would be worth it to get serious about changing that, to take control now? I mean, 9 times out of 10, you didn't mean to snap at, make fun of, get mad at, or tease those people. Those are the times we're talking about now. Reactions to those types of situations can be changed.

And, actually, change really is fairly easy.

You know why? Because whatever you did, you likely did out of habit. In other words, you 'reacted' out of habit.

Why not make a new habit? One that benefits everyone in the long run.

Here's what you do to make it easy NOT to react -- out of habit:

Instead of reacting, decide to ask yourself these questions 'automatically':

Did the other person do something unintentionally? Meaning by accident?

Did the other person do something immediately -- meaning they reacted to something YOU did?

If the answer is yes to either, it's easier to let it go by, because, hey, we ALL make mistakes. Again, let it go.

Now, if this isn't the case, still see if you can let it go. Ask these questions:
Can I release it?
Will I release it?
When?
(You can read more about this at http://www.tameyourbrain.com/releasing.htm )

Now, IF you can't let it go right away -- and that's totally OK if you can't, (we all move at our own speed) here is another way to handle it.

When you get home that evening, and are able to sit down and relax, think about it. Replay the scene. Only this time, replay the scene showing how you were able to let it go.

What do you think about that? Of course it doesn't change what happened in the first place, but it does perform a very important function. It redirects your brain, so that you don't *automatically* do it the next time quite so easily. So that you are able to think twice before acting. Notice I said 'acting', not reacting?

Just because we overreacted yesterday doesn't mean we'll overreact today. Not if we take the steps to change. Those steps are: Release your negative thoughts. Replay the scene showing us totally relaxed and in control.

Why do we want to do this? Because the more we take charge of our emotions, the more we will be relaxed and in charge of our emotions.

And won't that be nice?

Good luck!

Thanks for reading.

Jan Tincher,
TameYourBrain.com

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DISCLAIMER: Jan Tincher and/or *Tame Your Brain!* do not guarantee or warrant that the techniques and strategies portrayed will work for everyone. The techniques and strategies are general in nature and may not apply to everyone. The techniques and strategies are not intended to substitute for obtaining medical advice from the medical profession. Always consult your own professionals before making any life-changing decisions.