When I think of divorce, I think of pain, loneliness, despair, heartache, anger. I think about the hole left in your heart when you lose that someone who was, in all probability, very close to you at one time . . .

Let's take each of those feelings individually.

Pain. Do you find yourself just sitting there and hurting, emotionally? Stand up.

Loneliness. Do you find yourself sitting around all day lonely? Stand up.

Despair. Do you find yourself sitting there, thinking despairing thoughts? Stand up.

Heartache. Do you find yourself sitting there, nursing your heartache? Stand up.

Anger. Do you find yourself sitting there, getting angrier and angrier? Stand up.

NOTE: When your physiology (body language) changes, your thoughts change. If even for a moment. That moment is all you need to get going and do something else. If you don't, it's a choice you make to NOT change. To stay in pain, loneliness, despair, heartache, anger.

There, now that you've stood up, walk. Walk for five minutes taking deep breaths. Actually, breathe in on four huffs through your nose and breathe out on four huffs through your mouth. Breathe in on four huffs through your nose and breathe out on four huffs through your mouth. Breathe in on four huffs through your nose and breathe out on four huffs through your mouth.

Now that you've found the rhythm, as you breathe in think something like, "I am getting better and better." As you breathe out, think "Every day in every way, I am happier and happier."

There. That's the first five minutes of your fifteen minute workout to eliminate pain, loneliness, despair, heartache, anger.

The next five minutes to eliminate pain, loneliness, despair, heartache, anger, you don't need to do the breathing exercise because you need to concentrate on what you are saying. It will start out with, "I am so happy and grateful . . ." For the next five minutes come up with things in your life right now, that you are happy and grateful for. Even if it's that the sun is shining, the sun is shining, the sun is shining . . . well, you get the idea. Fill the second five minutes with things you really are grateful for in your life. (Or that you could be grateful for if you could let go of your negative feelings.)

Now, during the next (and final) five minutes of your fifteen minute exercise to eliminate pain, loneliness, despair, heartache, anger, spend your time being thankful for what you don't have, but can visualize coming. For example, be thankful for your new car. Oh, you say? You don't have one and because of the divorce you'll probably never get one because you are sooooo broke! Doesn't matter. These next five minutes are your future. Plan it the way you want it. For the next five minutes say, "I am so happy and so grateful for my new car." "I am so happy and so grateful for my new home." "I am so happy and so grateful for my new life." And start getting very descriptive of what you want. Spend these five minutes being very happy!

Now, divorce doesn't have to be a difficult topic. You're not going to let it be. Why? Because you've just taken control of your life!