Copyright © Jan Tincher - All Rights reserved
http://www.tameyourbrain.com

I am dedicated to showing people how to live their lives successfully. However, I feel that death should be dealt with, too. We have an opportunity to make one last contribution. Let’s make sure we make it our best . . .

Regardless of when that time comes, we are all going to die. We are considerate of others when we live, let's be considerate of others when we die.

NOTE: There may be some that actually think people SHOULD grieve or HAVE TO grieve at their funeral. People grieve in the way that is best for them. That doesn't mean it has to be at a time and place they will remember for the rest of their lives -- the funeral. If you feel they must grieve at your funeral, this article isn't for you. Sorry.

Let's think about your funeral. People are going to be pretty upset, aren't they? What do you think? Should you do what you can to help them get through this, or should you let them grieve?

Let's remember that grieving is an individual process. Everyone does it differently. You will, too, when someone dies and leaves you to go to his or her funeral, then to face your life the next day without them. Wouldn't you say that's a bad enough trek for you?

Why should people suffer more at a funeral than they have to?

NOTE: This is not a recommendation of any sort. I am fully aware of the different aspects of dying, of mourning, and of the seriousness of it. I am just showing you options.

How about you? You have to make a choice every time you think about your loved one that has passed over. Are you going to think sad thoughts or are you going to think good thoughts? (You know what I prefer. YOU make your own decision, BUT make it wisely.)

Do you realize that good thoughts will help that person's soul continue on its journey. Do you realize bad thoughts do not help that person's soul continue on its journey?

I'm sure, somewhere, it has said we should have long funerals. However, I disagree. If fellowship is needed, and I feel it is, then have a long reception with planned socializing. Why not have something that encourages togetherness, so people know they aren't alone?

The point is, we are all going to die. The point is, we can be in charge of our own funeral. The point is, WE can make OUR funeral set the pace for our loved ones while still being sensitive to their needs.

The reason the experience at the funeral is so important, in case some of you don't know this, is because we don't cry our hearts out at the funeral and then go out and live our lives as usual the next day. It's too hard. We have a memory now of the funeral that we will carry with us. It is up to the person who has passed over to do what they can ahead of time to make sure their funeral sets the right pace, that the memory doesn't hurt any more than it has to.

There is a little song below. If you don't like it, per se, take responsibility to find something to take its place. But only IF you agree that a funeral sets the pace for your loved ones and their memories of you. IF you agree that the sooner a person can start living productively again, they will start living productively. IF you agree that we need to change the course funerals have been taking.

We don't need to march to the old drummer. We need to start living our lives as successfully as we know how. We need to direct our deaths as successfully as we know how, so the living can get on with their lives.

You Can't Sing If You're Dead . . . But the congregation can.

This is one song that comes to mind as the casket goes out, but only if you have a sense of humor. I mean no offense.

To the tune of: "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!"

"There's a fly in my casket, close the lid.

There's a fly in my casket, close the lid.

There's a fly in my casket, it will stay if I ask it.

There's a fly in my casket, close the lid."

NOTE: There is a second verse. Interested?

Do you like this article?

Thanks for reading,

Jan

Copyright 2010, Jan Tincher, All Rights Reserved Worldwide

DISCLAIMER: Jan Tincher and/or *Tame Your Brain!* do not guarantee or warrant that the techniques and strategies portrayed will work for everyone. The techniques and strategies are general in nature and may not apply to everyone. The techniques and strategies are not intended to substitute for obtaining medical advice from the medical profession. Always consult your own professionals before making any life-changing decisions.

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